Monday, September 22, 2008

Lots to be Thankful For!

I cannot tell you how many people I know right now that are pregnant. I started to write down names and then count them but I would assume that it is around 20-25. It is insane!!! I guess I am just at that age. I am so incredibly happy for all of my prego friends!!!! I love sharing this time with others that are experiencing the same things. For those that are pregnant with their first, I love being the one to tell the newly pregnant mommies to enjoy every minute because it is over before you know it! I remember thinking that I would never have the baby when I was pregnant with Rachel and then longing to feel that kick and movement inside after she was born. It is absolutely the most incredible thing EVER!

I also am reminded of the fact that there are so many that want to experience these things and can't. I find myself feeling almost guilty for being insensitive to the fact that I have so many friends that I love dearly who have lost babies in the womb or shortly thereafter and those that could/can't conceive at all. Is it fair for me to be joyful when they are watching person after person have the one thing they long for and can't have? I have often thought that I would want to be a serogate mom. Really! I have even mentioned it to Brice before...he wasn't thrilled with the idea...I think it is just a desire I have for women who want to be mothers so bad to be given that gift. Then, I have to step back and think about God and how He plays into all of this. He is Sovereign and He is supreme. He gives us just what we need when we need it. I certainly do not have all of the answers to life's problems or as to why God allows things but I do know that He is all powerful and all knowing and if He denies someone something, it is for a reason. The verse says that He will give us the desires of our hearts but those desires have to be His desires as well. I know that these things are easy for me to say....one who has a child already and one growing in my womb. Know this....my heart hurts DEEPLY for those that have lost children or those that cannot conceive. I cannot tell you how much it hurts me to know that some women cannot have biological children. I consider it a true blessing and a miracle from God that He has allowed me to birth a child and the privilege to carry my unborn child as I type this. When I was pregnant with Rachel, I looked at Brice (as if a light bulb went off in my head) and said, "Wow....God does love me. God does forgive. This is God's way of showing that to me. God is giving me a second chance." Do you know exactly what I meant? Probably not but the fact is that I do not take lightly the privilege and responsibility of being a parent...more specifically...a Mommy!

That was NOT the original intent of this post...but apparently, I needed to say it.

I started a Beth Moore Bible study tonight. It is her new one....Stepping Up. I think it will be really good. It is about the Psalms...more specificially, The Psalms of Ascent. I will keep you posted....I am excited!

Well, since this post lasted way longer than I intended, I guess I will wrap it up now. I am getting sleepy. I do have a few new pictures that I will post tomorrow!

Love you guys!

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