Showing posts from 2016

Grace Still Covers Me

A dear friend of mine texted me this week and told me to listen to this new song by Casting Crowns - who I adore!!!!  This is just a great song!!!  I am posting the lyrics because they are awesome and I cannot find a link to the video yet, but everyone needs to download this song!  My favorite line in the song is

"I hid from you haunted by my failure, and found a God whose grace still covers me."
"God Of All My Days" I came to You with my heart in pieces
And found the God with healing in His hands I turned to You, put everything behind me
And found the God who makes all things new I looked to You, drowning in my questions
And found the God who holds all wisdom And I trusted You and stepped out on the ocean
You caught my hand among the waves ‘Cause You’re the God of all my days CHORUS: Each step I take
You make a way And I will give You all my praise
My seasons change, You stay the same You’re the God of all my days
                        I ran from You, I wandered in the …

Living Loved

I started my very first Proverbs 31 Online Bible Study this morning.  I was very excited about this study because it is based on the new book by one of my favorite authors - Lysa Terkeurst.  The Bible study is about living loved when you feel left out, lonely, and less than.  The book is Uninvited.  I have had the book for awhile but have hesitated getting started with reading it because I knew that it would hit hard and somewhere very deep.  I don't want that to sound like a "oh, poor pitiful me" statement because I am not wanting anyone to feel sorry for me.  I don't often feel uninvited or left out but it is the feeling loved part that I struggle with.  I have really really been battling this for about 2 years or so and even more so in the past year.

This morning, we watched a couple of videos and had our first memory verse.  The memory verse was Colossians 3:12.  I am going to give it to you from the NLT because I really like the part that says "people he l…

In the Silence

What do you do when your husband takes your kids, all of them, to Arkansas for a week and you are left by yourself?  You do all of the things that you can't do when the kids are home, right?  You plan stuff every night.  You stay up super late and eat ice cream for dinner.  And watch movies that children's eyes can't see.  You have friends over and go to the movies, shop, and get pedicures.  That all sounds fun but I actually did not do ANY of that.  None of it.  
At the end of the previous week, I posted about how my week was...well, less than what I wanted it to be.  And, I am not going to take that back, but it was actually a blessing in disguise.  At the end of that post, I said, "God is so good." And, you know what?  He is!  I wasn't trying to convince myself that He is good.  I believed it because I knew that, even in the midst of a crummy week, He had something in store for me that I could not see at that moment.  And, boy, was I right!  
I remember thi…

What If!?

I feel like I spend my life asking the question "What if?"
The fear of the unknown seems to be something that I struggle with more than I care to admit but why?  Control.  That is what I have decided that it all boils down to.  I want to be able to control every situation and know the outcome.   What if I knew the outcome before taking the action?  Would I make a different choice?  Perhaps. Maybe not.  Who knows.  The thing is....I would be able to control what happens.  
I remember back to 2010 when I had surrendered and repented of a past sin and knew that I had to go and confess this sin to someone very close to me.  The days leading up to meeting with her were nearly excruciating.  I knew that I was doing the right thing by getting my heart right with God and not allowing satan to have the stronghold over this area of my life any longer, but I was so afraid of what this might do this relationship.  What I distinctly remember in the days and weeks leading up to the meeti…

What I Have Learned This Week

What I have learned this week is a lot of things that I likely already knew but I was reminded of from real life circumstances. I learned that life is hard. I learned that letting go of things can be uncomfortable and tricky but necessary. I learned that when your figurative plate is full, you have a tendency to drop it and break it, shattering everything on it in the floor. I was reminded that those that love you the most can hurt you the most. I learned that the closer you get to God, the more satan attacks where you are most vulnerable. I've learned that just when you think you have passed through the valley and are on the upward swing, another dark cloud can come. Perception is key and pride can destroy almost anything. People feel loved and give love in different ways and it is important to know the difference. I've learned....well, I've admitted that social media is a major source of anxiety for me. I've learned that I CAN live without social media. When things w…

Trust or Faith?

The definition of trust is: belief that someone or something is good, honest, reliable, and effective. It is the assured reliance on the character, ability, strength, or truth of someone or something. It can also be defined as one in which confidence is placed. 
Faith is a strong belief or trust in someone or something. The dictionary defines faith as complete trust. The Bible defines faith as the "confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see." (Hebrews 11:1) 
Are these two things the same? Is one dependent on the other? That question may be for someone a tad smarter than me but I will tell you what I do know.
I know that trust does not come easy for me. I know that hurt has been a real part of my life. I know that I don't like it. I know that I have walls. Tall ones. I know that I have a tendency to be cold towards people and not even realize it...especially if I have even an inkling that I will be hurt. I know tha…

Somedays You Just.....

Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose...that's how the saying goes, right? I think it is safe to say that someDAYS we win and someDAYS we lose...especially as parents. Y'all, if you are a parent you totally understand where I am today, I guarantee it. 
As most of you know, I have three girls - ages 9, 7, and 14...oops, I mean 4. My girls are such a treasure to me. God's grace is not lost on me, especially when I look in the face of my beautiful children. But being a mom is the hardest thing I have ever done. Ever. I feel ill equipped, unworthy, frustrated, and just downright defeated sometimes. How can someone so small have so much power over you?! 
The reason why we make ourselves crazy where our kids are concerned is because we want them to grow up and be decent, functioning people in society. I would love for my kids to become something productive one day...helping others and living as God would have them. It's my greatest desire to see my children come to the Lord an…


Even on the crummiest of days, God is still good!! 

He gives us people in our life to remind us that He loves us! 

Friends help us remember to laugh....even when all we want to do is cry. 

A friend loves at all times. Proverbs 17:17

God has blessed me far beyond what I deserve. Yes, today had some rough moments that reminded me that people are not always nice and that life is not always easy, but God is ALWAYS good!! I am so grateful for the friends He has given me. 💜💜 I love them dearly and I will NEVER take them for granted. Never. 

What If....I am Fearful?

Flying?  Nah. I like it.  It doesn't bother me.  Actually, it is even a little bit thrilling.  I mean, the take off...sometimes that can really be a big rush!  Roller coasters.  The anticipation might turn my stomach but it isn't scary.  It is exciting!  I love the excitement of the twists and turns.  Bees.  Now, my husband, he has a fear of bees.  Well, any flying, stinging insect, really.  Not me.  Just walk past them, and for the most part, they won't bother you.  If they sting you, it...well, stings, and then it goes away.  
fearan unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat.  
I am afraid of spiders.  They are sneaky and creepy crawly.  I feel like they are just kind of out to get me.  Storms!  I am TERRIFIED of storms.  Fearful does not even begin to describe how I get during a bad storm, especially when tornadoes and sirens are involved.  I am scared of the dark, of huge giant roaches (I call them…

I Am Saying, "Yes"

Sometimes when it is almost super late-30, your FitBit is screaming at you regarding the fact that you have registered nearly 16,000 steps, and your alarm went off at 4:00 am summoning you to work out, the logical thing to do would be to go to bed.  Yes, that is what seems like the smart thing to do, but sometimes God lays a message on your heart that you feel like you need to share. **Besides, I was waiting up to see my friend, Candace, AKA ChewbaccaMaskMama, on The Late Late Show!!!  Is she not hilarious?!  So happy for her.**

I cannot express how incredible the past few months have been for me.  There have been days that were so incredibly painful that I did not want to get out of bed, much less talk to anyone, but persevere I did.  No, nothing major has happened but I have struggled with emotional days that I cannot explain.  What keeps me going?  Joy that only comes from Jesus Christ.  My daily walk with God, my quiet time that speaks to my heart and mind more than I can explain,…

Is It Worth It?

Sticky fingers, digging in the dirt and giggling about the things of the day, two little curly headed girls run around at recess. It wasn't long ago that they begged their mom to buy matching outfits and the heart necklaces that have the jagged edges with "Best Friends" etched in them, one for each to wear. That way the whole world, well, their whole world, would know that they belong to each other. She is the other's "person." Who knew a tiny girl needed a person? What are the odds that those two darlings will remain friends for a lifetime? Is the investment at such an early age worth it?

Whispers of true love. Who is taking who to the prom? Notes being passed in the halls, or these days it is more likely texts exchanged. The excitement fills a young girl's heart as she shares her deepest secrets to her best friends. The teenage years, such an awkward time and a time when friendships are so very important. Endless sleepovers, Friday night football games…

No Rhythm, No Worries? No Problem!

About two months ago, I decided that I wanted to go see Carrie Underwood in concert.  I checked her tour schedule and my friends calendars to see if a girls' weekend was possible.  One of the girls was already busy that weekend :( but the other three of us decided to go!  At that time, the closest venue to Dallas that Carrie was to appear was going to be Bossier City, LA.  Of course, since that time, she has added other cities, guessed it, DALLAS!  O'WELL....we needed the weekend away!

This weekend was SHOW TIME!!!  I took off on Friday. I asked Brice to get us some snacks.  Every good girls' trip should include:  peanut butter M&Ms, our favorite drinks (Diet Dr. Pepper for me, Coke for Rachel, and water for Sara), popcorn, Chex Mix, and Twizzlers, of course!! :)  I downloaded Carrie's CDs on iTunes, burned them on discs, got everything and everyone in the car and we were headed out!!!!  First stop, Zig Zag Stripe Boutique in Mansfield!
I won't…

He Is Better

"For the Lord your God is living among you.  He is a Mighty Savior.  He will take delight in you with gladness.  With His love, He will calm all your fears.  He will rejoice over you with joyful songs." ~Zephaniah 3:17

 All I prayed for was for God to make my feelings change.  I had been feeling so desperate for love and so incredibly sad for the past three days and I could not stand it any longer.  That morning, I uttered two very distinct prayers intermingled amongst the other things I said to God.  Those two things were:  God, change my feelings.  Please, just make my heart feel better.  I am broken and I do not know what to do, and keep satan so far away from me today.  I know that he loves to take anything when I am like this and dig deeper into my insecurities.

This was Monday...this past Monday.  Let me back up a little.  My feelings have been waxing and waning for quite some time over the past several months.  While I can recognize that God has been doing some good th…